When I tell my friends that I have to be back at home by 7PM everyday, most of them think I am on a police curfew. Little do they know, it is a household rule set up by my parents that I've had since I was 17. Now, I'm 21
Amongst my people, I’m renowned for being outgoing, loud and just full of life. So, when I tell people that, yes, I am 21 – but am still on a parent curfew, they’re left shocked and speechless. I’m literally the lastperson that anyone would think has a curfew, especially at my age. I am basically living the life of someone on an electronic tag, without being on a tag.
The majority of the time I speak in slang with my bredrins (and switch it back to the Queen’s English when in a job interview, or a professional environment) makes people think I’m rebellious and road. With my addiction for big hoop earrings and beanie hats, people often assume I have a lot of freedom because of the way I dress, particularly since I am a Muslim girl. I don’t wear the hijab so some think my mum and dad are very modern and that I can do whatever I want. In comparison to most 21 year olds I know living in London, I do not have that much freedom.
I didn’t have a curfew before I was 17. I wasn’t allowed out on my own (unless it was a 15 minute walking journey to school every weekday), as my parents were really protective. From the age of 11 to about 16, I can remember I spent most of my childhood at home, reading books and watching Tracy Beaker. Although my parents were strict and my lack of freedom influenced me in some negative ways, it wasn’t that bad. I had to remember that my parents were born back home in Bangladesh and had a different outlook on life.
“Usually, when I mention to someone that I’m on a curfew, people automatically presume it’s a police curfew based on their judgements about how I talk and look.”
My friends were allowed at my house, though, and soon my home became a popular hangout for everyone. I regularly hosted dinners, making food like Tandoori chicken and Pilau rice, and had friends over for sleepovers (I was only allowed to invite female friends). At about the age of 17 I was given a curfew, because my parents had finally got the courage to let me merge with the outside world and fend for myself. I’d usually have to be home before 5pm and only now has it changed to 6pm-7pm.
Funnily enough, I would say that I don’t mind my curfew so much anymore, as I am more aware of what goes on outside. Now that I am older, I am happy my parents didn’t let me out (as I most likely would’ve got in trouble!). The roads are not so glamorous as people make them out to be.
When I was younger, I used to get really frustrated that my friends were going out to the cinema and I hadn’t watched any of the latest films, which meant I was excluded from some conversations. That didn’t stop me talking, whether it was my latest crush or something funny on TV.
I’d be lying if I said my curfew doesn’t affect my day-to-day activities. There are events I go to and I have to lie and say I’m on a trip. (Yes, at 21!) Though most perceive me as a ‘gangsta girl’ or whatnot, I am very respectful of my parents and choose to abide by this curfew, most times anyway. I’m not an angel, but I am content with the freedom that I do have, as there are many who are in worse situations.
Many find it strange how I am so willing to follow my curfew because of the restrictions it has on my days. Usually, when I mention to someone that I’m on a curfew, people automatically presume it’s a police curfew based on their judgements about how I talk and look. Actually I’m not a criminal, just a young girl who respects my mum and dad’s traditional ways of parenting.
Feature image by Katie Morgan.
Feature image by Katie Morgan.